Copy Edit the World! 22 points total

"they" must be capitalized because it is the beginning of a new sentence. (4 points)

http://spartandaily.com/60399/the-san-jose-state-marching-band-wows-on-the-field
In the first paragraph it says "an original eight- to 10-minute set." 
It should be 8 to 10-minute set. (2 points)

This brochure says "premium luxury makes."
It should be "premium luxury models." (4 points)



This flyer says "firewoks."
It should say "fireworks." (4 points)


http://spartandaily.com/60225/coach-mac-corner-fresno-st
-The Spartans will take on the Fresno State Bulldogs at Bulldog Stadium on Saturday, a game that MacIntyre admitted is a big rivalry game for SJSU.
-It should say "at the Bulldog Stadium" (2 points)


http://spartandaily.com/61213/aerobicthon-jazzercisin-up-success
-Over 200 participants from SJSU and the wider community fell in line to put their bodies through the 15 minute aerobic routines which included Zumba, kickboxing, Bollywood bhangra, hip-hop dance and Jazzercise.
-It should be "15-minute" (2 points)


http://spartandaily.com/60852/relationship-story
-Relationships are the bread and butter that keeps people whole and together – we wouldn’t be who we are without them.
-Keeps should be keep (2 points)


Same source above.
-Junior biology major Katie Allen said the romance isn’t as abundant as her and her boyfriend would like because of their busy schedules but they realize school is important, as is his job and taking care of their 8-month old.
- 8-month old should be 8-month-old. (2 points)

Column (So sorry its late, the holidays really set me back)

            Black Friday, a day filled with great deals but also great stress.

            On November 25^th, the doors open for thousands of people waiting to snag the best deals first.

            Black Friday is to sales as Thanksgiving is to turkey.

            Mothers across the nation anxiously await the stroke of midnight to capture the most ideal sale and get items that will soon be sold out.

            The demanding children these days will not have any thing less then their demands.

            In the state of this economy, parents are looking for any way to save a buck anywhere they can.

            If they aren’t trying to save a buck they are trying to optimize on the most stuff while they can because come Saturday, the hot commodities will be gone.

            Children are present with their parents and are subject to angry and selfish shoppers.

            This is not a place for children to play but instead are used as fast and sneaky grabbers.

            The employees in the mall dread every minute closer to midnight because nothing before this moment has prepared them for shoppers this year.

            This year is projected to gain the most revenue than all previous years, which in turn means that there will be the most ruthless shoppers in full force.

MADD Story

            MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, is a program that people join to fight against driving under the influence.

            On campus, in front of the Event Center, there is a display of the aftermath of a car that was hit by a drunk driver.

            In the car were husband and wife, Michelle and Steve Benjamin.

            The drunk driver ran through a stoplight going 70 miles per hour in Oakland, hitting the passenger side head-on, and killing Michelle Benjamin.

            Steve Benjamin is permanently injured form the accident but attends the program, Every 15 Minutes, frequently.

            Every 15 Minutes is a program that MADD puts on, to educate teenagers in high school of the real consequences of drunk driving.

            Natasha Thomas, the program coordinator for MADD in the Bay area, is in charge of five counties and 67 cities.

            Thomas travels to various schools to educate the public of the realities of drinking and driving.

            The culture of alcohol seems cool on television and in music, it seems to “Glorify the consumption of alcohol,” said Thomas.

            This week is especially important to Thomas because it is Red Ribbon week.

            The Red Ribbon represents alcohol and drug awareness and its dangers.

            The program is not limited to drinking and driving but it is “considered to be as impaired driving,” said Thomas.

            Thomas has many events this week and has spoken with over 3,300 students in the last two weeks to lead up to this week.

            In the display to her left, there was a clear trailer with a crashed car inside which is the exact car that the Benjamin’s were driving the night they got in their accident.

            “Is it real?” Is the most frequent response to the trailer, said Thomas.

            I spoke with a fellow attendee named Cody Murphy, and he was especially moved by the display because he knew someone who had passed from a drunk driving accident.

            “It’s hard to see it in person because it reminds me of my past friend who had been involved with a drunk driving accident. This is a powerful display that every one should see.”

Gordon Greb Story

                                                                       Gordon Greb    

            A legend comes back to San Jose State University to offer his wise advice to aspiring journalism students. Gordon Greb chose to study broadcast journalism over business here at SJSU because it seemed more fun and appealed to him more. Thankfully, that decision was the reason the broadcast journalism department is what it is now. When he was a student at SJSU, radio was the only form of news and entertainment for people in America. He landed an internship to have his own time slot on the radio that ultimately led him to start his broadcast journalism career.

            Greb became a world traveler after his role as a radio broadcaster. His travels brought him to appreciate the world in a new light that helped him grow very fond of the American Constitution. He values the system we are governed by so he advocates the children of America to be proactive the same way he was.

            The most interesting thing I thought about Greb was that after working for so many years in the newsroom and as a journalist, he is still a positive person. “Make love not war,” is a quote that he frequently used which was coined during the Vietnam War when he was a journalist. To live a life that consisted of young revelry made Greb the political youth activist he is. It exciting and powerful to hear the words of a person that has had an outstanding career and the words “You are the future,” took on a new meaning for me. His last words upon leaving SJSU were to “Take care of the children and we’ll be alright.”

            His accomplishments as a journalist and teacher are outstanding but to Greb his most prized accomplishment is “being a good father and grandfather.” Greb’s influence on the broadcast journalism department and in San Jose’s local news is unmatchable. 

Word Count: 312 

How Wired Are You?

I received 15 points so I am "plenty plugged in, but keep upgrading." I am very comfortable with online social sources which gave me a few points. I use Twitter, write on multiple blogs, use my smartphone to email, text, and surf the web. I can record edit and post a video online. Unfortunately, I am not very educated on making my own website or using interactive graphics which led to me have fewer points.

Professor, I'm sorry it's so late. I've had a really hard week with my friends funeral, and having a chest cold I have had a lot on my plate.

Copy Edit the World

http://spartandaily.com/44556/sjsu-falls-short-on-third-straight-loses-to-byu

"half-time" is supposed to be halftime: 4 points.

My photo did not send but it was a poster in your class and the mistake was "we are not responsible for any loss data." It is supposed to be "lost." 4 points

Copy Edit the World

1) SANTA CRUZ -- In honor of the 3 millionth plastic bag never packed with fresh food at New Leaf Community Markets since 1993, the local natural foods grocery store is promising to donate 20 cents for every customer who shops at any of its six locations today with a reusable bag. Plastic-bag (2)

http://www.santacruzsentinel.com/news/

2) A senior defense official said the U.S. hasn't yet used the Reapers deployed the Seychelles to conduct armed reconnaissance on pirate ships, but the option is open to use the drones to strike at pirates who have mounted attacks. Hasn’t used (2)

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424053111904106704576583012923076634.html?mod=WSJ_hp_LEFTTopStories

3)  Need occasional child care. I have a 3-year-old Daughter and an

8-Month-old Daughter. 8-month-old daughter (4)

http://www.care.com/visitor/browseJobDetails.do?jobId=790866&distance=4&rowNumber=28

4)

 I am looking for someone to care for my 2 dogs and cat while I am away. The dates listed aren't confirmed yet, as they will vary based on finding a responsible sitter. My two dogs are well behaved, but need lots of daily structure. They go on 2 structured walks daily of approximately 30 minutes each. They also are fed 2x a day, and their food requires about 5 minutes of prep work. They are both taking simple medications which are relatively easy to administer. I would prefer to hired someone who has at least a basic understanding of dog psychology, or is willing to learn/use methods similar to my own. My cat only needs to eat, have her litter boxes cleaned and be hang out with my dogs. She eats throughout the day and hunts for tiny portions of food hidden in appropriate places throughout the house. In total, my animals will only require about 1. 5 hours of work a day (walks, feeding, litter box cleaning, meds). I would prefer someone who can stay overnight, as one of my dogs occasionally wakes me up to go to the bathroom. If you're interested, I'd love to meet you, and for you to meet my dogs and cat. two dogs (4)

http://www.care.com/visitor/browseJobDetails.do?jobId=871925&distance=2&rowNumber=1

TOTAL: 12 POINTS!

Link to TOP NEWS #2

http://www.cnn.com/2011/09/20/world/europe/italy-quake-trial/index.html?iref=allsearch

REAL Top News Blog #2 (scratch the first one)

The article, "Italian scientists on trial for L 'Aquila earthquake," by Livia Borghese is a trial held for 7 seven scientists being prosecuted for the deaths of 300 people. An unannounced earthquake in Italy could have had a lot less damage than it did with the help of the geophysics scientists. They are being held for trial by the government for unpreparing the citizens of Italy. This is a very serious story because it makes citizens wonder how effective or trustworthy our own scientists are. California has a big disastrous earthquake record. Could we have been prevented by earthquakes that have shattered our homes or even killed people? It is a sad fact that if the scientists that work for Italy spoke up about a possible earthquake, lives would have been saved.

Top News Blog #2

Kate Treen

19 September 2011

Top News Story #1

                                                            Campus Movie Festival

            For the past six years, the campus movie festival has been publicized to SJSU students to encourage their creative film skills.

            Each five-minute video will be entered in the contest judged by SJSU faculty. The winner of that goes to the regional level and possibly the national level. If won on the national level, a free trip to Hollywood will be the prize.

            That is not the primary reason the campus movie competition is held though. “It’s a fun tradition at San Jose State University,” said Richard Dillon, a coordinator in student involvement. “This year is to publicize the campus movie festival to encourage more students to do it,” said Dillon.

            After all of the videos are submitted, Dillon and other coordinators, will compile the videos in to one long movie. Every contestant will be able to view the other submissions and show of their own for a fun movie night get-together.

            The video is due in two weeks which means students have limited time to prepare for the video. However, the video can be on what ever the creator pleases. The contest is not limited to any certain group but for every student who is interested. This will give students a chance to exercise their creative film making skills.

            

Fog Index

I calculated my words per sentence on average were about 18-20. The total number of "hard" words used is about 6 in a 136 word paragraph. My fog index turned out to be about 9.6. This exercise helped me see that smaller sentences are easier to comprehend and weeding out the verbiage in my sentences is very beneficial. The paragraph I chose was part of a blog post for another writing class.

"The most influential writing that appeals to me on a day-to-day basis is news writing. I am constantly reading the most recent current events around the world. I am a firm believer that it is crucial to understand the issues and events that are happening all around the world. It can relate to you in some way, even if it’s not significant. The writing in news stories is meant to educate and inform people with a condensed overview of a story. I appreciate the writing style of news stories because I feel it educates me with words I didn’t know and with certain circumstances I didn’t know. I enjoy reading CNN articles the most because I think it is the most truthful interpretation of an event. There is less biased opinion and more straightforward facts."

Got what it takes to be a reporter?

The score I got was 21 points which says, "Reporting is a good fit for you, mostly, but it may require you to change your attitude or improve some skills. Personally, I do not think I would make a great reporter because It takes time for my to transfer my ideas on to paper. However, I could ask questions and rebuttle questions quickly which could make me a good interviewer. I would love to work in a news room but probably not as a reporter. I am very passionate about the news so if I really tried to be a reporter I know I could be good at it. I am good with technoloy but I am not so good with researching, or atleast not yet. I am the type of person that if I see something, I am tenacious until I get it. I do not think I have a thick enough skin to be a reporter however. Overall, this test helped me sort out my strengths and weaknesses which I can now get better at with practice.

Student Journalists' News Attitude Survey

After I took the student journalists' news attitude survey I compared my results to other students. I put that news stories usually contain inaccuracies and distortions. I perfer to get my news through a combination of text and images. I generally think the goverment should do as little as possible to restrict what the news media publish. If the president was assassinated I would turn on the TV, then leave it on constantly to monitor the situation. I consider Katie Couric to be a journalist. In general, I think the news is biased in favor of niether. When I hear conflicting versions of a news story I will most likely believe the national TV news. I think most news stories today are sensationalized. I generally watch TV news several times a week. I read news online every single day. I occasionally will read the newspapers. A news reporter career seems like it would be important. If I was in the situation where a judge ordered me to reveal the name of a confidential source it would depend on the circumstances of the case to determine any actions. I perfer news that is as neutral and objective as possible. I could not go a day without reading any news. I think journalists do not do enough to challenge public figures and expose governmental problems. I can usually relate to most news stories I read,see and hear. I frequently take the time to read long stories that analyze issues in depth. Generally, I perfer to read news about serious issues and major events.
I felt like for the most part I was with the majority of other students but some were different. It is interesting to see how different other students view the news and what media outlets are most utilized.

Top News Story #1

http://money.cnn.com/2011/09/13/news/economy/census_bureau_health_insurance/index.htm?hpt=hp_t2

This story is news worthy because it holds all of the components of a story that readers would be interested in. It has impact because it relates to all 50 million americans without health insurance. It has immediacy beacuse it is an ongoing problem and the study keeps changing. The prominence pertains to America as a whole. The numbers keep climbing and new studies are showing more and more americans without health insurance which can affect all americans who pay for health insurance which involves conflict and emotion. It involves emotion because it is a sad statistic and it just shows how badly our economy is doing.

My mission for Journalism 61

I am really excited to take Journalism 61 this semester. My goal for this semester is to be able to write news stories and critique the stories from a professional standpoint. With in the first 2 weeks of class I can already see an improvement in the way I write. I am extremely passionate about the world and becoming educated from different points of view and perspectives. This class will be fun and educational, which in my opinion, are the two primary points to making a successful class.